I Can't Get My Shit Together!

I'm going to bed around 3:00am on average.  I'm too embarrassed to say what time I get up.  I'm in deep depression and I know it.  My Psychiatrist tried to put me on an anti depressant a couple of months back but it made me wake up too much during the night and we all know how OCD Desiree is about her sleep.  "Her world is all about getting those 8 hours of sleep."  It's been my obession for 28 years now.  That's a long time to have an obsession.  I even hate Fucking facebook.  The one thing that brought me out of depression 4 years ago has brought me back into it.  I don't know, I just don't like the format at all anymore.  It's become a Fucking Betty Crocker Cook Book.  I'm not intereste. When I first got on Fucking facebook I was so excited to catch up on people I haven't seen since highschool.  I would write and write and people would respond and respond.  We joked and shared laughs, it was fun.  Now fucking facebook is a CHORE.  I would say I like 10% of this social media.  I can't deactivate my account because all my pictures tell a story so I'm stuck. I'm stuck in a Fucking Facebook rut.  "Desiree I know how impulsive you are"...."Don't Deactivate, Don't Deactivate, Don't Deactivate"...."Well Desiree what about your sewing, quilting, & crocheting?....Biking?.....We thought you liked all that?"...."No, all that's becoming a Fucking CHORE too.  "What about your dancing?... "We all know you love to dance"....."Well I hate my hair and my eyelashes fall off, so I can't go dancing"...."How about books and movies?"..... "You use to love them"......."My standards for movies are pretty high and books, well a book really has to be something I'm interested in, and I can tell you for a fact I don't EVER read what everyone else is reading (nobody lean me books, I won't read them).... "So Desiree what has become your new obsession or pleasure?"....Obsession>Documentaries.....Pleasure>1st cup of coffee at noon and that's about it!......"Desiree,  I reread everything you just typed, it really sounds like you need an anti-depressant."......YOU THINK??????